Jonathan's Visit to the Celestial Empire
by James Kirke Paulding
Somewhere about the year 1783, Jonathan, a young fellow who lived
away down east, took it into his head to make a voyage to Canton.
Accordingly he fitted out his sloop, a tarnation clever vessel of about
eighty tons, and taking a crazy old compass for his guide, his two
cousins, one a lad about sixteen, and a great Newfoundland dog for his
crew, and a couple of rusty revolutionary swords for an armament, he
boldly set forth on a voyage to the celestial empire.
Jonathan was a mighty cute lad, and had read a little or so about
the great devotion of the Chinese to the herb called ginseng, which
every body knows is a remedy for all things. He happened one day to
hear an indian doctor give it as his opinion that a certain plant,
which grew in the neighbourhood of Jonathan's natale solum, was
very much like the famous Chinese panacea, as he had seen it described.
He took a hint from this, and rather guessed he would carry a good
parcel along with him on speculation. Accordingly he gathered a few
hundred weight, dried, and stowed it away in one of his lockers, under
the cabin floor.
Providence, which seems to take special care of such droll fellows
as Jonathan, who calculate pretty considerably on their native
energies, blessed him with fair winds and good weather; his old compass
behaved to admiration; his ancient chart, which had been torn into
fifty thousand pieces and pasted on a bit of tarpaulin, proved a most
infallible guide; and some how or other, he could not exactly tell how,
he plumped his sloop right into Table Bay, just as if the old fellow
had been there a hundred times before.
The dutch harbor-master was sitting under his hat on his piazza,
when he beheld, through the smoke of his pipe, his strange apparition
of a vessel, scudding like a bird into the bay. He took it for the
famous Flying Dutchman, and such was his trepidation, that he stuck his
pipe into his button-hole without knocking out the ashes, whereby he
burnt a hole in his waistcoat. When Jonathan rounded to, and came to
anchor, the harbor-master ventured to go on board to get information
concerning this strange little barque. He could talk English, Dutch
fashion, for indeed he had been promoted to the office on account of
his skill in languages.
"Whence came you, Mynheer?" quoth he.
"Right off the reel from old Salem, I guess," replied Jonathan.
"Old Salem—whereabouts is dat den? I tont know any sich place
"I guess not. What's your name, squire?"
"Hans Ollenbockenoffenhaffengraphensteiner ish my name."
"Whew! why it's as long as a pumpkin vine— now aint it?"
"But whereabouts ish dish blashe you speague of?" reiterated the
"O, it's some way off—about six or eight thousand miles down west
"Six tousand duyvels!" muttered Hans with the long name. "Do you
tink I vill pelieve such a cog and pullsh tory as dat, Mynheer?"
"If you don't believe me, ask my two cousins there—and if you
don't believe them, ask my dog. I tell you I come right straight from
old Salem, in the United States of Amerrykey."
"United Sthaites of vat? I never heard of any United Sthaites but de
Sthaites of Hollant."
"Ah—I suppose not—they've jist been christened I 'spose now,
likely you've never heard of the new world neither, have you
mister—what's your name?"
"Hans Ollenbockenoffenhaffengraphensteiner— I told you zo pefore."
"Maybe you'll have to tell me again before I know it by heart, I
calculate. But did you never hear of the new world, squire?"
"Not I—ant if I hat, I vould'nt hafe pelieved it. Tare ish no new
vorlt zinze de tiscovery of de Cape of Good Hoop dat I know. Put, gome
along, you must co vid me to de gubernador."
Jonathan puzzled the governor about as much as he had done the
harbor-master. But his papers were all fair and above board, and the
governor had not only heard of the new world, but of the United States
of Amerrykey, as Jonathan called them. Accordingly he was permitted to
enjoy all the privileges of the port.
Nothing could exceed the wonder and curiosity excited by the vessel
among the people at the Cape. That he should have made a voyage of so
many thousand miles, with such a crew and such an outfit, was, in their
opinion, little less than miraculous; and the worthy governor could
only account for it by the aid of witchcraft, which, he had somewhere
been told, abounded in the new world. Jonathan was the greatest man,
and his dog the greatest dog at the Cape. He dined with the governor
and burgomasters; cracked his jokes with their wives and daughters,
danced with the Hottentots, and might have married a rich Dutch damsel
of five hundred weight, and five thousand ducats a year, provided he
would have given up old Salem forever.
After partaking of the hospitalities of the Cape a few days,
Jonathan began to be in a hurry to prosecute his voyage. He knew the
value of time as well as money. On the sixth day he accordingly set
sail amid the acclamations of the inhabitants, taking with him a
hippopotamus, an ourang outang, and six ring-tailed monkeys, all of
which he had bought on speculation. One of his cousins had, however,
been so smitten with the country about the Cape, or with the charms of
a little Dutch maiden, that he determined to stay behind, marry, and
improve the inhabitants—on speculanation. A Dutch sailor offered to
supply his place, but Jonathan declined, saying he guessed his other
cousin and the Newfoundland dog, who was a pretty particular cute
kritter, could sail his sloop quite round the world and back again.
Not much of interest occurred during the voyage until he arrived at
Macao, where he excited the same astonishment, underwent the same
scrutiny, returned the same satisfactory answers, and came off as
triumphantly as he did at the Cape of Good Hope. While here, he saw
every thing, inquired about every thing, and went every where. Among
other adventures, he one day accompanied his cousin in a fishing-boat,
to see if they fished as the people did on the banks of Newfoundland.
Unfortunately a violent storm came on; some of the boats were lost, and
their crews drowned. The survivors went and offered up some of their
paddles at the great temple of Neang-ma-ko. Those that were able added
some matches and gilt paper. Jonathan's other cousin here determined to
stay behind at Macao. It occurred to him he might make a speculation by
curing the fish after the manner of mackerel. Jonathan did not much
like this, but he said "never mind, I partly guess I can do without
Jonathan had now no one but his New foundland dog to assist in the
navigation of his sloop. But he thought to himself, his voyage was
almost at an end, and, at all events, if he hired any of the Macao
people, they would be offering up matches and gilt paper to
Neang-ma-ko, instead of minding their business. So he set sail for
Canton, the Chinese prognosticating he would go to the bottom, because
he did not make an offering to Neang-ma-ko, and the Portuguese that he
would go to the devil, because he did not pay his devoirs to the virgin.
At Lin-Tin he was taken for a smuggler of opium by some, and for a
magician by others, when they saw his vessel, heard where he hailed
from, and became convinced that his whole crew consisted of a
Newfoundland dog. The commander of the fleet of ships of war stationed
at Lin-Tin, to prevent the smuggling of opium into the celestial
empire, seized the sloop, and devoted its brave commander to the
indignation of the mighty emperor, who is brother to the sun and moon.
Hereupon Jonathan bethought himself of a piece of the herb he had
brought with him and had in his pocket. "It is a mighty good chance,"
thought he, "to try if it's the identical thing." Accordingly he took a
convenient opportunity of presenting to the valiant commander a bit
about as big as his finger. The admiral, whose name was
Tizzy-Wizzy-Twang-Lang, stared at him at first with astonishment, then
at the present with almost dismay, and thrusting it into his pocket,
immediately caused it to be proclaimed that the "foreign barbarian" was
innocent of the crime, or the intention of smuggling opium, and might
go any where he pleased. Tizzy-Wizzy-Twang-Lang then sat down and wrote
a despatch to the governor of Canton, stating that he had routed the
"foreign barbarians," destroyed their fleet, and thrown all their opium
overboard. After which he shut himself up in his cabin and took a
morsel of the treasure Jonathan had presented him, about as large as
the head of a pin. It is astonishing how much better he felt afterwards.
In the mean while Jonathan had set sail, and was ploughing his way
towards Canton, with a fair wind and a good prospect of making a great
speculation, for he had ascertained to a certainty that the article he
had brought with him was the real ginseng, which was worth five times
its weight in gold. He went ashore at the village of Ho-tun, where he
saw the people catching wild ducks and geese, which they fatten by
feeding in the dark. "That's a good hint," said Jonathan, shutting one
eye, "and I'll tell the folks at old Salem." While he was walking
about, seeing into every thing, he was unexpectedly saluted by a shower
of stones from a parcel of children, with their hair sticking up behind
like two horns. Jonathan thought this tarnation ungenteel; but he
prudently suppressed his anger, considering he was in a strange
country, and was come to try his fortune.
"May I be buttered," quoth Jonathan, as he approached Canton, and
saw the countless boats moored in streets on the river, or flitting
about in every direction—"may I be buttered, if here isn't a city all
afloat. This beats all nater!"
And sure enough, here was a scene that might have made one of our
Indians wonder. The whole world seemed on the water. Junks, with two
eyes staring at the bows—canal-boats, flower-boats, pleasure-boats,
and boats of all sizes and descriptions, filled with all sorts of
people, lay moored in regular streets, or were moving about to and fro
in every direction, painted in all the colors of the rainbow, and
ornamented with gold leaf and grinning monsters having no prototypes in
nature, or any where else but in the grotesque imagination of the
artists of the celestial empire.
The busy activity of some of these boats was singularly contrasted
with the luxurious ease of others, in which might be seen a couple of
Chinese dandies reclining on mats and resting their heads on bamboo
pillows, with pipes in their mouths, either listlessly contemplating
the scene before them, or gazing with lack-lustre eye on the picture of
some favorite beauty with penciled eyebrows, nails like a tiger, and
feet almost invisible. Others were performing the ceremony of
chin-chin-jos, which consists in throwing bits of burning paper into
the water, while the din of innumerable gongs contributed a species of
music to the scene that made honest Jonathan stop his ears in
When our adventurer moored his sloop at Whampoa, in the midst of a
fleet of vast ships, of almost all the nations of Europe, they did not
know what to make of her. All he could say failed in convincing them
that he had come from such a long distance, in such a vessel, navigated
by such a crew. Besides, what could have brought him to Canton? He had
neither money to purchase, nor cargo to exchange for Chinese
commodities, except it might be his river horse, his ourang-outang, and
Jonathan kept his own secret. He had heard that the Chinese were as
sharp as the "leetle end of nothing whittled down," and determined to
be as sharp as the best of them. Accordingly nothing could be got out
of him, except, that he had come on his own bottom, and meant to turn a
penny some how or other. He said nothing about his ginseng, which he
had, as I before stated, stowed away in a secret locker.
The story of the strange man and the strange vessel that had been
navigated from the new world by a man and a dog, made a great noise,
and thousands flocked to see them. The gentleman who officiated as
American consul, without, however, having a regular appointment,
behaved in the most kind and friendly manner to Jonathan, and
introduced him to a hong, or as our hero called him, a hung
-merchant, who undertook to do his business for him, that is, if he had
any to do, which seemed rather doubtful.
"I chin-chin you," said Fat-qua, the hongman.
"You don't now, do you?" quoth Jonathan. "Well then, I chin-chin
you, and so we are even, I guess."
Fat-qua was very anxious to know all about Jonathan's business; but
the Chinese were such plaguy slippery fellows, he was afraid to trust
them with his secret. He therefore, very gravely, and with infinite
simplicity, commended to him his cargo of live stock, begged he would
dispose of them to the best advantage, and invest the proceeds in a
cargo of notions. Fat-qua did not know whether to laugh or be
angry—however, he concluded by laughing, and promising to do his best.
The trifle which Jonathan brought with him had been all expended in
maintaining himself and his dog, and Fat-qua did not feel inclined to
advance any on the security of his live stock. This being the case,
Jonathan one day brought a pound or two of his ginseng, and asked him
carelessly what it might be likely worth in these parts?
"Hi yah!" exclaimed the hong-merchant in astonishment. "No, have got
some more of he— hi yah?"
"Some small matter—not much," said Jonathan, who was of opinion if
he displayed the whole parcel at once, it might lower the price and
injure his speculation.
Fat-qua disposed of the two pounds of ginseng for a thumping sum,
which Jonathan pocketed in less than no time, and chuckled in his
sleeve, as he thought of the means to get rid of the whole at the same
rate. A day or two after, he delivered the hong-merchant a few pounds
more, which he said he had accidentally found in a place where he had
stowed away and forgot it.
"Hi yah! Missee Joe Notting, I chin-chin you." And he began to have
a great respect for Missee Joe Notting.
In this way, by slow degrees, did friend Jonathan bring forth his
hoard of hidden treasures, till it was all disposed of, and he found
himself in possession of almost half a million of dollars; for, it is
to be recollected, this happened long before the value of ginseng was
brought down to almost nothing by the large quantities carried to
China, in consequence of the successful speculation of Jonathan.
Every time he produced a new lot, he declared it was all he had
left, and consequently, to the last moment the price was kept up.
Fat-qua began to believe that Joe Notting had discovered some hidden
place where it grew, in the neighborhood of Canton, or that he dealt
with the prince of darkness. He accordingly caused him to be watched,
but our hero was too wide awake for the hong-merchant.
"Hi yah! Missee Joe Notting—some yet more— when you shall tink
shall you no more have—hey? Every day here come you—say the last is
he—hi yah! I tink no last come forever."
"I han't another stick to save my gizzard," said Jonathan, and this
time he spoke like a man of honor. He had at last sold out his hoard,
with the exception of a small parcel for presents, and to use on an
Jonathan was now thinking he would gather himself together, and
point his bowsprit strut towards home. But first he determined to see
about him, for he expected to be asked a heap of questions when he got
amongst his old neighbors; and not to be able to tell them all about
the celestial empire, would be to show he had little or no gumption.
He accordingly visited the famous flower garden of Fa-Tee, where he
saw a vast collection of the most beautiful flowers, and roses of all
colors. Returning, he passed through the suburb of HoNam, where he was
called Fan-kwei, which means "foreign devil," and pelted handsomely
with stones, according to the hospitable custom of the inhabitants.
Jonathan was now so rich, that he felt himself a different man from
what he was when the boys pelted him at the village of Ho-tun. He had
moreover seen the bamboo so liberally employed on the backs of the
Chinese by their own officers and magistrates, that he thought he might
make use himself of this universal panacea for all offences in the
celestial empire. Accordingly, he sallied forth among these
inhospitable rogues, and plied his stick so vigorously that the rabble
fled before him, crying out "Fan-kwei!" and making motions significant
of cutting off the head, as much as to say that would be his end at
last. The reader must know that beheading is considered the most
disgraceful of all punishments in the celestial empire, where they do
every thing differently from the rest of the world.
A formal complaint was laid before the Gan-chatsze, a minister of
justice at Canton, against the Fan-kwei, who had feloniously bambooed
the mob of HoNam. Fat-qua, one of our hero's securities, was taken into
custody till his forthcoming, and an express sent off to Pekin to
announce the intelligence to the brother of the sun and moon, that a
Fan-kwei had beaten at least two hundred of his valiant and invincible
subjects, who could not bring themselves to soil their fingers by
touching even the clothes of a foreign barbarian.
Jonathan was soon arrested, and being carried before the illustrious
Gan-chat-sze, was astonished at seeing the infinite mischief he had
done. There was one poor man who had his eye put out; another his head
fractured; a third his arm broken; and what was worse than all this,
three children were so disabled that they could not stand, all by
Jonathan's bamboo, which was about as thick as your finger.
This was a serious business for a Fan-kwei. But his friend Fat-qua
whispered in his ear—
"Hi yah—Missee Joe Notting—you some more have got of that
grand—Hi yah! You stand under me—hey?"
Jonathan tipped him a knowing wink, and Fat-qua then crept close to
the ear of the incorruptible Gan-chat-sze, and whispered him in like
manner; but what he said being only intended for the ear of justice,
must not be disclosed. The effect, however was miraculous, the
Gan-chat-sze forthwith started up in a mighty passion, and, seizing his
bamboo, attacked the complainants in the suit with such wonderful
vigor, that he actually performed a miracle, and restored every one of
them to the use of their limbs. After this, he discharged the offender
with a caution, which Fat-qua translated into excellent English, and
the next day Jonathan sent him by the hands of the same discreet friend
a pound of ginseng.
"Hi yah! Missee Joe—more some yet, hey! Believe him make him as
him go along—Hi yah! Chin-chin you, Missee Joe Notting."
Fat-qua was determined to signalize this triumph of Chinese justice
over prejudice against foreigners, by a great feast of bears-claws,
birds-nests, and all the delicacies of the east. He, therefore, invited
a number of the Fan-kweis about the factory, to meet Jonathan at his
country-seat, near the gardens of Fa-Te, and they had a jolly time of
it. Our hero was complimented with a pair of chop-sticks of the most
elegant construction and materials, which he managed with such skill,
that, by the time the dinner was over, he was well nigh starved to
The hong-merchant, Fat-qua, was a jolly little fellow, "about
knee-high to a toad," as Jonathan used to say, and fond of a good glass
of wine. He plied his guests pretty neatly, until they began to feel a
little top-heavy, and sailed away one by one under rather high steam,
leaving Jonathan and his friend alone together, the latter fast asleep.
Jonathan was by this time in high feather, and thought this would be a
good time to take a peep at the establishment of his friend, that he
might know something of these matters when he got home.
He arose without disturbing the little fat gentleman, and proceeded
to penetrate into the interior of the house, until he came to the
female apartments, in one of which he saw a young lady smoking, to whom
he paid his compliments with a low bow. Her pipe was formed of slender
pieces of bamboo, highly polished, with a bowl of silver and a
mouth-piece of amber. Her hair was beautifully long, and tastefully
dressed with flowers and gold and silver bodkins, and the whole
atmosphere of the room was perfumed with jasmine and other odoriferous
plants and shrubs. By her side lay a guitar, on which she seemed to
have been playing.
The entrance of Jonathan threw her into great confusion, and she
uttered several violent screams, which however brought no one to her
assistance. The illustrious Fat-qua was still sleeping in his seat, and
the servants making merry as usual with the remains of the feast.
Jonathan attempted an apology for his intrusion, but the more he
apologized the louder the young lady screamed. Jonathan wondered what
could be the matter with her.
"Well, I never saw any thing like this growing among corn—what's
come over the gal? May I be chiselled if I don't think she's afeard
I'll eat her. But why the dickens, if she's frightened, don't she
scamper off, that being the most nat'ral way of getting out of danger."
Jonathan did not know the feet of the poor young damsel were not more
than two inches and a half long, and that she could no more run than
fly. They were what the Chinese poets call a couple of "golden lilies."
Encouraged by this notion, that her pretending to be frightened was
all sheer affectation, he approached her still nearer, took up the
guitar, and begged her to play him a tune, such as "Yankee Doodle," or
any thing of that sort that was pretty easily managed, for he did not
much admire any of your fine fashionable gimcracks. Jonathan was a
plaguy neat kind of a chap—as handsome a lad as might be seen; tall
and straight, with blue eyes, white forehead, and red cheeks, a little
rusted to be sure with the voyage.
The pretty creature with the little feet, whose name was Shangtshee,
ventured at last to look at this impudent intruder, and, sooth to say,
he did not appear so terrible at the second glance as at the first. She
smiled, and put out her small foot for Jonathan to admire. She then
took her guitar and played him a tune—it was not "Yankee Doodle" to
be sure, but it rather pleased Jonathan, for he declared it beat all,
he'd be switched if it didn't. Shangtshee seemed to understand the
compliment, for she smiled and put out her other golden lily, I suppose
to show Jonathan she had a pair of them. Jonathan admired the pipe; she
handed it to him, he put it to his lips, and giving it back again, she
put it to her lips, which our hero finally concluded came as near to
kissing as twopence to a groat.
"How the kritter blushes," thought Jonathan. He did not know she was
painted half an inch thick after the fashion of the Chinese ladies. As
they sat thus exchanging little pleasant civilities, which, innocent as
they were, endangered both their lives, they were alarmed, at least the
lady—for Jonathan had never particularly studied Chinese customs—
by the sound of a guitar, at some short distance, in the garden. It
approached nearer, and, in a few minutes, seemed directly under the
window of the apartment. Shangtshee appeared greatly agitated, and
begged Jonathan by signs to depart the way he came. But Jonathan had no
notion of being scared by a tune, and declined to budge an inch. It
was a nice tune, and he didn't much mind if he heard another just like
Presently the music ceased, and all at once the young Shangtshee
screamed a scream almost as loud as the former ones. "What can have got
into the curious varmint now, I wonder?" quoth Jonathan. He little
suspected she had caught a glimpse of the face of her lover through the
blinds. This young man was called Yu-min-hoo, which signifies
feathered, because he was a great poet, and took such high flights that
his meaning was sometimes quite out of sight. He always carried an
ink-bottle suspended to his button, a bamboo pen stuck behind his ear,
and a book under his arm, in which he wrote down his thoughts that none
might escape him. He made verses upon Shangtshee, in which he compared
her to a dish of bear's claws, since her nails were at least six inches
long, and she was a delicacy which the epicure might admire every day
in the year. It was this sentiment which he had set to music and sung
on this eventful evening under the window of his mistress.
Yu-min-hoo was petrified when he saw his Shangtshee sitting so
cosily by the side of a Fan-kwei, which, as I said before, means
foreign devil. His indignation was terrible and his jealousy
prodigious. He had thoughts of sitting down by the light of the moon
and writing a furious ode, consigning the Fan-kwei to all the Chinese
devils, which are the ugliest in the world. Even their gods are
monsters, what then must the others be? On second thoughts, however,
Yu-min-hoo restrained his muse, and in a moment or two they heard the
clatter of his wooden shoes gradually receding. Shangtshee again
entreated with her eyes, her hands, nay, her very feet, that Jonathan
would make himself scarce. The tears ran down her cheeks, and like
torrents of rain wore deep channels in them that almost spoiled their
Jonathan tried all he could to comfort her, when what was his
surprise and indignation at her base ingratitude, he was saluted with a
scratch of those long nails that constitute the most unequivocal claim
of a Chinese lady to rank. It was a scratch so emphatic and
well-directed, that every nail, and most especially the little finger
nail, left its mark on his cheek, and it was preceded and followed by a
scream of the highest pretensions.
Our hero was astounded at this salutation. He had heard of love
taps, but never of such as these. But he soon understood the whole
squinting of the business as slick as a whistle, when he saw little
Fat-qua standing before him breathing fire and looking fury from his
dark sharp-cornered eyes.
"Hi yah!—Missee Joe Notting—spose tink you daughter my one
Jonathan endeavoured to convince Fat-qua that there was not the
least harm in sitting by the side of a young woman in a civil
way—that it was done in his country every day in the year,
particularly on Sundays—and that the women there were quite as good
as the Chinese, though they did not wear wooden shoes, and nails six
Fat-qua was wroth at this indecorous comparison of the Fan-kwei
ladies with those of the celestial empire; he ordered his servants to
seize Jonathan as a violator of Chinese etiquette, and a calumniator of
wooden shoes and long nails. He determined in the bitterness of his
heart to have him immediately before the worshipful Gan-chat-sze, who
would not fail to squeeze some of his dollars out of him.
But further reflection induced him to abandon this course. He
recollected, when the fumes of the wine were somewhat dissipated, that
both himself and his daughter would be disgraced and dishonored if it
were publicly known that she had been in company with a Fan-kwei, a
stain of the deepest dye according to the statutes of the celestial
empire, in any but common women. The only way, therefore, was to make
the best of a bad business. Accordingly he bribed his servants to
secrecy—married his daughter to the poet—and swore never to invite
another Missee Joe Notting to dine with him so long as there was a
woman in his house. He had never, he said, met with a fellow of this
Various were the other adventures of our hero, which are forever
incorporated in the annals of the celestial empire, where he figures as
the "Great Fan-kwei, Joe Notting." My limits will not suffice to
particularize them all, else would I record how he was fined a thousand
dollars by his old friend, Gan-chat-sze, for bambooing a valiant
sentinel who refused to let him enter the gates of Canton without a
bribe; how his river-horse, being tired of confinement, took an
opportunity to jump overboard, whereby he upset a boat and came nigh
drowning the passengers. This cost him three thousand dollars more. His
next adventure was picking up the body of a drowned man in the river
one evening, in passing between his sloop and the shore, whose murder
he was found guilty of before Gan-chat-sze, who kindly let him off for
ten thousand dollars; advising him at the same time through the
hong-merchant, Fat-qua, to take the earliest opportunity of making
himself invisible within the precincts of the celestial empire.
"I partly guess I'll take his advice, and pull up stakes," said
Jonathan. "I never saw such a tarnal place. It beats every thing, I
swow. Why, squire Fat-qua, I'll tell you what—if you'll only come to
our parts, you may go jist where you please—do jist as you
please—and talk to the gals as much as you please. I'll be choked if
it isn't true, by the living hokey."
"Hi yah! Missee Joe Notting," replied Fat qua, "she must be some
very fine place, dat Merrykey."
"There you are right, squire. But, good by; I finally conclude it's
best to cut stick. They're plaguy slippery fellows here; if they aint,
may I be licked by a chap under size."
Jonathan received the remainder of his money, which he was then
earnestly advised to invest in bills, and at the same time to sell his
vessel, and embark for home in a safer conveyance.
"D'ye think I'm a fellow of no more gumption than that?" said he.
"I'll be darned if there's a tighter safer thing than my old sloop ever
sailed across the salt sea; and as for your paper money, I've had
enough of that in my own country in my time."
He declined shipping a crew, for he said he must trust, in that
case, to strangers; and he thought to himself that he could easily
induce his two cousins to go home with him now he was so rich. It
happened as he had anticipated; both gladly rejoined him again, each
having failed in his speculation. The Dutchmen at the Cape forbade the
one using a machine he had invented for saving labor, lest it might
lower the price of their negroes; and the Portuguese and Chinese
refused to eat the fish of the other, because he neither crossed
himself before the picture of the virgin, nor burnt gilt paper to the
image of Neang-ma-ko.
A prosperous voyage ended in Jonathan's happy return to Salem, where
he became a great man, even to the extent of being yclept honorable. He
lived long and happily, and his chief boast to the end of his life was,
that he had been the first of his countrymen to visit the celestial
empire, and the only man that navigated with a Newfoundland dog for an